As the year ends..

There is nothing in this world which makes me happier than listening to Cold Play, type in my old age computer not the laptop or ipad..the computer keyboard….no I am not one of those who has taken a liking to touch phones and ipads…but I still own them…this exactly points how contradictory we are… As the year ends...this is all I could think of...

We like something yet we end up with something completely different.

I had stopped writing on my personal blog, why? Because everything around is so impersonal.  One moment which stayed with me this year was while passing by in the taxi, I saw a young naked boy in the arms of his little sister looking eagerly at a passerby’s packet of food, a lady sitting under the flyover, her permanent address may be, and two men sitting on the chair waiting with plates for food to be served. The taxi went in a hurling speed, life moved on, so did theirs, but left an imprint on me.

Another learning—Indians aren’t equipped to deal with solo female travelers. Had the time of my life travelling across Udaipur, yet those glaring eyes, the ones that question-“the girl is travelling alone?”, “How did your family allow you to travel alone?”, “You don’t have anyone to travel with? And the best is when the woman asks her partner to get up and she comes and sits next to me…as if I have nothing better to do in life!  Some ugly looks some sniffs…yet there is nothing that has made me happier than travelling alone basking in the nature, the great Aravalis during rains, the black clouds pouring just when you stand atop the Monsoon Palace..these are joys may be you can never describe nor relive!

Biggest Learning—Some so called friends stabbed right in my back and some fake friendships still continue to weigh on..apparently being honest dosen’t leave you with anyone! So here is to being little nice this year!

And of course- I still can’t believe I inspired someone to drop his job study and go to college! I am always so proud of you my little brother, my friend! @arunabho: I am so proud of you that you got through your dream college and ofcourse this made this year close at its best!

Got my dream job too… yet…

Lived life on my terms…and thus…

Still figuring out how people fall in love …but…

Funnily those gaps will have to find their answers some day and “Lights will guide you home…”

Why am i unsafe in my city?

I am a scattered and cluttered brain. I am writing a personal blog after a very long time. What i will write is offensive, its not for every one. You will judge me for every word that i write, you will say, "kuch bhi likhti hai", "jhola leke andolan karna shuru karde", " dude, what shit man" ...i know but you know what i still want you to read this. Its in hindi, so it might be so downmarket for some of you, you will think it doesn't happen to people around us...this happens in burbs (suburbs), no da, this is the story everywhere, close your eyes, or your brains, but yes this is the fact, and we deal with this every goddamn day!

Kyun jab ek ladki share auto me baithey toh woh sikudtey rahey? Kyun nahi jagah de saktey use ki woh bhi baithey tumhare jaisey... Kyun jab hum galti se general compartment me chadh jaye toh log keh uthey, ye gents compartment hai.....kyun ghurtey rehtey ho aisey? Kya dikh jayega tumhe? kyun hum yunhi dartey rahey ki koi hame hath na laga dey, kyun hum itne satark rahey ki koi hume chu na jaye....kyun first class me munh ke samne har roz newspaper dhar ke baithey ki samne khada woh admi hamey ghurta na rahey.....kyun mauka patey hi humey log hath lagatey rahe....

Maine toh na dekha aaj tak ki kisi ladki ne cheda hai tumhe, toh itni talab kyun hai tumhey apni chichori harkaton ko bayan karne ke liye.....

Kyun ek ladka apna back pack back me liye chale aur kyun har ladki use samne liye? Kya takleef hai tumhe gar hum formal-one piece pehney ya saree? Tere baap ke paise se na kharidi hai na kharidengey apne kapde, toh fir kyun takleef hai tumhey ki hum kya pehne?

Office tum bhi jatey ho hum bhi jatey hain, raat bhar kaam tum bhi kartey ho hum bhi kartey hain, toh fir kyun hi koi keh jata hai, ye ladki roz late ati hai, pata nahi office me kya karti hai......Sapne tumhare bhi hai aur hain hamare bhi, toh kyun log ye samjhtey hain ki hum kamatey hain shopping karne ke liye? 

Kyun hi shadi career se badhkar hai, aur kya khana banana hi humara janam siddh adhikar hai? Kab niklengey hum is soch ke pare, kab samjhengey ki hamare bhi hai sapne asmaan chune key....

Sharab tum bhi pitey ho hum bhi pitey, toh character hamara kyun less ho jata hai, kyun hum us 'type' ki ho jatey hain, kyun hum 'easily available' ban jatey hain? Kyun kisi single ladki ko ghar rent par nahi detey? Kyun hamare character par hai itney sawal uthtey? Hai soch kharab tumhari, uska bhugtan hum kyun karey? 

Kyun hai aaj hum unsafe apne hi shehron me, kyu dar lagta hai hume kisi ko thappad laganey me jab woh hamse battmeezi karein, kyun hai aaj log itne darey apne hi muhollley aur rishtedaron ke beech me, kyun dartey hain bachhey aaj school janey se, kya milta hai tumhe ek 6 saal ki bacchi ko rape karne sey.....kyun sab hai itna badla hua ek dashak me, ya tha yehi pehli bhi aur hum they ankhein meechey hue? Koi toh bata de kyun sari nazrein hai mujhpe jab mai khadi hun station me akele apne train ka intezar kartey hue.....

Fairfax to acquire BB?kya bolti?

Dear Mr. Hyderabadi Biryani (Fairfax owner), 

tum kayeko kaliberri leni???unsold inventory kilo ke bhav me milti kya? fone leni toh leni tum humko wapas same price pe chipkati? Mera frendz mere pe hasti ki mai do do blackberry leke ghumti...BB hath me insult sath me...tum zara kuch change kayko nahi karti?10 percent holding se seedha private karti...jawabdari nahi leti...fukat me tum paisa waste karti..itna paisa hai toh hum garibo ko college jane ko paisey deti na...stupid!....ideas mangti humko puchti ...ye blackberry sidha uthake tumhare sir pe marti! stupid fone upar se mahinne ka adha salary kha jati...
Tumko malum hoti free mey bhi koi bb nahi leti, tum smart hoti toh dus taka bechke lungi uthake ijjat bajake ghar aajti....

Matri-Mental

I just couldn’t stop myself from writing this one.

I love birthdays they are my favorite but with birthday comes the factor-so when is the bell ringing?

Which bell??? of-course the wedding bells , in my case it will be a gong than a small bell as I am the only candidate left for slaughtering. (people just cant digest happy single faces!)

So one fine day my mom went and paid a subscription amount to one of the largest wedding sites which recently opened a small office near my house. Let’s not do the name-game blame.
When my mom told me she has paid some Rs 4k for the same I was furious but as time passed, that website is the most entertaining platform off late.

Some people will come and comment on how you could write something like this or they might have copy right on what they write on the site. If I am violating IPR then my lawyer is available but trust me if this dosen’t make you laugh nothing will. —

These are some of the examples and trust me these are not even the best ones…they can be accessed for free so just have a gala time…

So these are taken from sections where the guy is supposed to write – partner preference or the kind of woman they would like to get married to and some are from the about me portions..

Here’s one--

“SHE MUST BE NATURAL(NOT TO USE TOO MUCH PERFUME, BODY SPRAY OR HIGH MAKE UP ALWAYS), ADJUSTABLE & STRONG-HARDY GIRL. I LIKE FLEXIBILITY ACCORDING TO THE SITUATION. I LIKE DUAL PERSONALITY GIRL. WHEN SHE TAKE CARE OF MY FAMILY AS A VERY GOOD, SHY GIRL, BUT WHEN SHE WITH ME AS A SOME BAD, HOT GIRL. SHE WILL DO TOO MUCH FUN-MASTI-PLEASURE & DOMINATE ON ME AS HER OWN WAY. I DON’T LIKE WEAK, POOR GIRLS.

Advantage for marry me: She must get a lifetime pleasure by me. I want to be very obedient of my wife & off course I love my wife more than me.”


Goes the next one---



“I am simple guy and i like also simplicity. I would like to visit Darjeeling that is wonderful in my life.”



This one is all for climate change—

”As I said I like nature very much, so, it's clear that I like to travel a lot to a nature oriented places. I like green nature very much. So, I have started a greenery in my garden. Though I am not a green thumb person, but I try.”

This is just a sneak peak for further entertainment go to one of the matrimonial portals :P

Cross-selling,wherz it headed?

As calendar year 2012 is paving its way for newer dateline, brokerages and analysts are busy coming up with their top 3 recommendation of the year. ofcourse, noone really cares after six months what happend to those calls except for the analyst whose prediction might have earned some money to his clients, most of them are overlooked in the heap of stock calls.

But as I was checking out the entire list, I came across the fact that a few brokerages have a buy on those same banks. Now I wont take the names of those specific banks, because that means i have to approach them, send questions and i don't think they have the time to respond to personal blog queries…anyway, So getting to the banking part, these are private banks which are invariably the banking behemoth of the country...top three or top five....with decent loan growth and an increasing non performing asset (NPA) blot on their books.

This certain bank, has been making waves with regards to its aggressive approach and branching out into various other things than its core banking operations.
Then there is another one, which undertook heavy downsizing during mid 2012 and had a fancy name to the entire process.. similar to the name of an animated movie where fish is trying to find his son....

These banks are now heavily dependent on the concept of "cross-selling".. cross selling is basically the front line person in the bank trying to convince you to buy various products like insurance/term plans/ they rarely try to sell mutual funds as it is not really a favored topic for banks/ new savings accounts/personal loans/car loans/deposits et al. Basically the person's job when hired was to look after only the counter or do something else which has now become an ancillary job.
According to banks cross-selling is all about reducing its expense per customer on cost of operations..basically why pay your employee for just serving the savings account of X…add loans/credit card/insurance/ every other product for consumption and help grow business.

But the problem that I see when I visit my bank is that the pressure of cross selling has hit the ceiling, I see most of my banking friends trying to stick some or other products to each of us.

Infact, the pressure is so high on these various levels of managers to meet their targets that I see them buying their own insurance or term plans because they have to meet targets. Now selling insurance or various other plans to some new customer is fine, but my concern is when these people are buying these products themselves or making their friends and family buy them. ofcourse the bank has no problem with it because they are more interested in how many policies were sold and how much margin they made on it, the problem begins when the person is unable to meet his earlier targets...ofcourse the person cannot sell the same thing every year to same people, customers are wary of buying any new product which they do not understand and how it works and there is not much you can do while doing your existing main work. Also the lure of capital markets for retail investors have gone up in last few years and larger chunk of insurance business stil lies with LIC. Even though some insurers tried giving out free pressure cooker or some other offering for buying their policies, people are still trying to stick with the old gun. And the old gun is busy spending the vault’s cash on government’s disinvestment program.
As the pressure mounts on either some fizzle out of action or your chances of promotion looks bleak…

Ofcourse it is not just one bank's story every other bank is upto the same gory story. But my concern is till when can this system sustain itself?
Of course India is a huge country and there is an untapped potential etc etc, but from where I see it the cracks are already there and it won’t take much time for it to rumble into ashes. Lets not forget 2008’s story so soon with the advent of credit card defaults everyone stopped giving out credit cards and personal loans. One hilarious example being banks don’t give credit cards to journalist..and I don’t know any journalist who does not have one credit card…

Home loans are not going up, car sales are down which easily indicates drop in car loans, personal loans are something i have no idea about but I am sure even they are in doldrums...so how are these banks which have lined up aggressive growth plans looking to grow? Has someone ever asked them what their new portfolio sales look like?if yes what are they? I don’t know how the future of people doing the cross selling looks like, but I really feel bad for them….

Mind it rascala!

I haven’t blogged in a very long time, nothing tempted me to sit and write on something but this thing just had to be typed down. Why now? maybe this incident is just the trigger. Ofcourse I am talking about the gang rape, eve teasing, manhandling and every other form where a woman is touched without her permission.

Last week while crossing the road, I saw a school girl being manhandled, by the time I screamed at that person, South Bombay being SoBo, cars started moving and I couldn’t do anything about it. I wondered why that kid didn’t stand up for herself, my blood boiled that she didn’t say a word and ran towards her school gate. I kept thinking why… and took me back to the worst memory of my school days.

It’s a taboo to come out openly and say yes, I was a victim, whereas the fact is every god darn women in this country has been one at some day. If you think I am wrong just go and ask your girl friend, ask your best friend, you will be startled to hear those stories. When I was a victim of eve teasing in school, I prayed every day that there will be a divine intervention and it will stop and I was not the only one there were more like me,and then ofcourse you fight back.... now eve teasing is a word which is commonly used in our Asia Pacific region –mostly in India and its neighbouring countries. I always thought why, I guess may be because we don’t have the guts to call a spade a spade. Let’s get it right – Its sexual harassment. Period. When a bunch of guys would touch you and you can’t do anything, they leave you with nothing but emotional scars. They leave you with memories which haunt you every time you walk alone and you see men staring at you.

They leave you with the fact that, hell you have to fend for yourself.

It happens to girls when they are in school, it happens as we walk on the street, in the general compartment of train, while crossing past the crowd, from anywhere to everywhere. There is some or other guy waiting to touch a woman. I don’t understand what pleasure can one derive from this behaviour, I don’t understand why cant you touch your own woman? Why come after strangers?? and the worst is when guys react after a woman screams back at them at public places.

What gives the right to a guy to touch any woman? It’s a punishable offence just that I rarely see anyone being punished from stories that I have heard from friends. Infact once a guy took the address from the police station and landed up at the girl’s house the next day when she was alone and asked her to pay off for the fine which he paid at the police station when she had lodged an FIR against him. Don’t believe that? Trust me, there are worse than this.

Why is it so okay for men to think they can touch woman and get away freely with that? More often than not I have seen woman either ignore or not react to what was just done to them. And when one goes silent, in most cases everyone prefers to shut their soul and walk ahead, my question is why?? if it hits your self-respect so badly, if it gets tears in your eyes, it boils your blood, and then why not stand up for yourself? What ails?

So when the pare-medic student was gangraped for giving it back to the men in the bus and no one has been caught yet, what point are we driving home? That we can’t hit back at men for our safety?
That the male ego just wouldn’t have it? Where are we headed? And to hell with the statement that Mumbai is safer. The mirage about Mumbai’ safety standards can be clearly stated with this year’s NCRB report. In a report released in June this year, Delhi registered 568 cases of rape, compared to 218 in Mumbai in 2011 according to National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) records. In the 2007-2011 period, Delhi topped the chart, followed by Mumbai, Bhopal, Pune and Jaipur.

But will something change?apart from the fact that crime rates are incessantly going up? I guess nothing will, the only thing that can change is how we react to the situation. So if you are reading this and you have wasted time to read this crap, then next time when someone purposely brushes off against you in that Dadar flyover or touches you in that busy train-stand up for yourself, don’t give in…. *Data note from ToI article via firstpost.

Enam Securities employees bid adieu to their alma mater

One look at Enam Securities’ office and one can see big cartons placed neatly next to every office desk with names pasted on them with new desk numbers written on it and everyone is busy scanning the desk and deciding which files and reports to put in the carton. After broking deals for a decade from this office (Enam had shifted to this office in 2001) this is the last day for employees of investment banking and securities division in the Dalamal Towers building, Nariman Point. From Monday they will be showing up at their new bosses’ Axis office at the Bombay Dyeing complex in Lower Parel. Enam has been the behemoth of the Indian investment banking industry and it has acted as lead manager for most of the big and successful IPO’s that the country has seen. On November 16, 2010, Vallabh Bhanshali, promoter of Enam had put a fullstop to this business by selling it off to Axis Bank which had then recently appointed Shikha Sharma as its MD and CEO. Bhanshali was advised by Anil Singhvi whereas Macquire Group had brokered the deal from Axis’s end which was signed in this south Mumbai office. Interestingly since its sell off to Axis, Enam has not brokered any big ticket transactions and insiders say it’s mostly the old deals that they have been working on before the merger took place. Its last IPO being the small sized central government’s realty company NBCC. There has been no news of any job cuts in the team. After sixteen months of hanging by the fence, reserve bank of India had finally approved the merger in April this year. Initially the deal was concluded at Rs 2070 crore, after coming under the central bank’s scanner the deal value was brought down by one-third the actual value. For Axis, which does not stand anywhere close to the league table this deal is supposed to change its future. Though the final approval from the share holders, high court and securities and exchange board of India is still awaited, the final integration will take place by the end of the year. The moving out of the employees from Dalamal Tower also means that the commercial office tower which the promoters of Enam had bought in the commercial business district Bandra Kurla Complex will need lesser office space. Earlier the promoters had thought that the team will operate out of the BKC office even after the sale. Sources say Enam is now either looking to sell off or lease the nearly 2 lakh sft space to possible tenants. Property consultants have been sounded off for the same, but for now its adieu time for employees in the investment banking, institutional and retail brokerage and other segments like financial distribution from South Mumbai office address.